Wednesday, April 23, 2014

The Latest from the Blizz

     Time for another blog update!

     So I've finally got my meds straight now for my depression I think.  I had a setback a few weeks ago when stress at work increased for me but I was able to break through.  It's so strange when this happens to me.  I feel like a completely different person.  Sometimes I wonder if I am bi-polar or if I have some other mental illness besides depression.  But as long as I can break through the hard times, I should be OK.  I started a new project at work that I am in charge of and at the beginning, it was really tough.  I felt overwhelmed and beaten.  All I could think about was work, even when I wasn't at work.  I had zero self esteem and felt like this was going to kill me or that they would fire me.  Looking back I realize how ridiculous this is but at the time, I truly was struggling.  I lost interest in nearly everything and didn't feel like doing anything.  The funny thing is, I'm not really sure how I was able to break through the depression to the other side.  Maybe it was just because the project finally got back on track and we got caught up to speed.  But now, I feel like myself again.  I feel like I can handle anything.

I need to get back on track with other goals now in my life.  I have to start running again and dieting.  I weighed myself the other day and I'm at the heaviest I've ever been again.  I know the road to getting healthy though and I feel very motivated to do it.  Both for myself and for others.

Easter has come and gone and my goal of giving up video games was successful over Lent.  I finished reading 3 books over the 40 days of lent which is a huge accomplishment.  I really enjoyed the Mistborn trilogy by Brandon Sanderson.  I was recommended it by a friend and it was fantastic.  It feels good to enjoy reading again.  I think just the simple act of reading and understanding a story has helped me with my depression too.

I'm looking forward to this summer.  I want to go to some Astros and Skeeters games.  I'm also considering traveling to Europe for vacation over the summer.  I am going to Vegas in May for a conference for work and to take a certification test which should help me further along my professional career so I am also excited about that.

Things are looking up and I couldn't be happier!